


31 Days of 00Q

by roseforthethorns



Category: James Bond (Craig movies)
Genre: 31 days of prompts, Additional tags in each chapter, Angst, Ficlets, Fluff, M/M, explicit starts in chapter 17, mostly 00Q, porn chapters, prompt tables, some rare pairs
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-02
Updated: 2017-07-29
Packaged: 2018-11-22 04:53:37
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 31
Words: 16,100
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11372976
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/roseforthethorns/pseuds/roseforthethorns
Summary: One of my contributions to the 007 Games for 2017!!! The goal is 31 prompts in 31 days with daily updates. I'll be adding the tags for each chapter in the notes.





	1. Downpour Dancing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags:
> 
> -James relaxing  
> -pre-slash  
> -00Q date  
> -Q's a cat because he hates rain  
> -dancing  
> -fluff

**Prompt: “You don’t know how to dance? Come on, I’ll teach you.”**

 

On second thought, going for a picnic during spring in England was a poor idea. Q and James had not been outside on their blanket for ten minutes before the clouds swept in and the heavens opened on their heads. Shouting about his tech, Q had darted towards the nearest tree, thankful it wasn’t a thunderstorm. As he stands beneath the sorry excuse for cover provided by the oak, he watches James who hasn’t followed.

James is standing with his eyes closed and his arms outstretched as the rain comes down. As Q watches, he begins to sway and dance in the rain.

If he hadn’t been there, Q would never have believed his eyes.

Realizing that he’s been left in the downpour, James opens his eyes and beckons to Q.

“No, I’m good right here.”

“Oh come now, Quartermaster. Where’s your sense of adventure?”

“Back at my flat with my dry jumpers.”

James laughs, properly barks a laugh and saunters over to Q. “You don’t like the rain?”

“No. I’m… allergic to it.”

“Really.”

“Oh yes. Terribly so.”

“I highly doubt you’re going to melt. Come on, come dance with me.”

A slight blush tinges Q’s cheeks. “I… I don’t know how.”

James raises a single eyebrow, staring at Q curiously. “You don’t know how to dance?”

Q shakes his head.

“Come on, I’ll teach you.”

“I have two left feet.”

“You forget. You’ll be dancing with me. Now come along, Quartermaster.”

Q sighs and pockets his poor mobile, allowing James to pull him back into the rain and teach him how to dance. By the time the clouds clear, he’s smiling and James leans down to taste that smile.


	2. Rainy Reunion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bond's predilection for vanishing on missions will get him killed one of these days. Or at least attacked by an angry Boffin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags:
> 
> -dialogue only  
> -banter  
> -Q's exasperated  
> -Eve loves pranks

**Prompt: “Your boyfriend is standing outside in the rain like one of those cheesy romance films.”**

 

“He’s coming back.”

“No, Eve, I don’t think he is. Not this time. It’s been nearly a month with nothing from any of my tech or Six’s sources. And I’ve been holding out hope as much as everyone else, but I think I have to accept the inevitable…”

“Q, he _will_ come back. He always does. Sometimes it just takes awhile.”

“Well if he does do you really think I’ll speak to him-”

“Yes.”

“You could let me finish my hypothetical before you butt in with your irritating certainty.”

“Come on, you love that about me. Besides, take a look out the window. Your ‘boyfriend’ is standing outside in the rain like one of those cheesy romance films.”

“What?! How long have you known?!?!”

“Oh pipe down and go make up with him.”

“He bloody well put you up to this didn’t he?”

“I’m not saying anything. Now  _ go _ , you silly boffin.”

“Paper clips. Nothing but paper clips on his next mission.”


	3. Silver Slip-Up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Missions aren't always nearly as easy as they seem.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags:
> 
> -angst  
> -memories  
> -Q in drag  
> -Bond struggling with his past

**Prompt: “You look beautiful. More than usual, I mean.”**

**+**

**Anon Prompt Exchange: 00Q that involves Q in a sequin dress**

 

James stands in the hotel room checking his tie and glancing at the bathroom door. Q’s been in there for over an hour now getting ready, and James is more than a little anxious that they’ll be late. But if Q’s disguise isn’t perfect, they could both be executed.

He sighs and wanders to the window, looking out over Casablanca under the light of a full moon. Of course his target would be throwing a party in one of the most notoriously homophobic places on the continent, and  _ of course _ it was a mission that required specific technology. Tech that Q doesn’t trust anyone else but himself to set up properly.

Hence their current situation.

Checking his Omega for the fifth time in as many minutes, James looks back at the bathroom door to see it open. He blinks and stares as his Quartermaster walks into the room.

_ God. Q looks like Vesper _ .

He’s taller, balancing effortlessly on silver heels beneath an ankle-length silver sequin dress. He must be wearing some form of corset because Q’s slimmer at the hips than usual, and his chest fills out the bust of the dress very nicely. A long, gauzy silver scarf wraps around his throat and hangs down to his knee. James’s eyes travel up Q’s face, and the resemblance to Bond’s dead ex-lover makes him swallow. Q’s eyeshadow and contours both soften and emphasize the angles in his face. His cheeks are tinged with blush, and his lips are a perfect, kissable cherry red. Q’s even put on clip-on silver earrings that show beneath his hair extensions.

“You look beautiful.” Bloody hell, even the smile is practically the same. Has Q always looked this much like her?

Q raises an eyebrow, but he smiles all the same. “Do I?”

“More than usual, I mean.” He can still see Vesper drowning, but now he’s seeing her smiling. At him. No, no this is  _ Q _ , not Vesper.

“Look, if you’re going to take the piss-”

“No, Q. I mean it.”

“Thank you, James. I have to remember to thank Eve for teaching me to walk in heels and how to do makeup. She’s brilliant with all this stuff.”

“Yes… shall we?”

James offers his arm, his heart clenching as Q takes it gently. He’s even had his nails done. James feels his throat tighten, and his emotional walls solidify. He can do this. He has to do this.

***

The party is torture.

Every time James glances Q’s way he sees Vesper, as if her image lays over Q’s form for a few seconds before he remembers himself. Q carries himself with the same grace and poise Vesper had once done, and it’s everything James can do to not avoid his partner.

They dance a few times, and James isn’t sure his smile reaches his eyes. Bollocks, he needs to sell this better, but Q doesn’t seem too worried. Maybe he thinks James is just in ‘agent mode’ and focused more on the task at hand.

When the mission is done and they’re back in the hotel, when they’re kissing on the balcony after drinking champagne, just as James thinks he can exhale, the word slips out, chilling the air and turning Q’s gaze hard as diamond.

“ _ Vesper _ .”


	4. Wary Walls

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's not easy to let people in. It's harder when everyone you've ever loved is dead.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags:
> 
> -angst  
> -all dialogue

**Prompt: “I push you away because it’s all I know how to do!”**

 

“Why don’t you ever stay? Or come around for anything other than a… what are these? Post-mission booty calls?”

“Q-”

“No, I’m curious. Because it’s been six months and aside from flirting at work and nighttime trysts, you don’t… it’s never lunch. Or tea. Or, hell, training with new weaponry. It’s just this and I’m wondering if that’s all I am to you. The cats like you. I… I like you. And you almost let me in just now but your walls came up as soon as I realized it.”

“Q, listen to me. You don’t want me for anything more than this. You deserve better than what I can offer.”

“Pardon my language, but fuck that. You’re what I want.”

“I don’t know why. Everyone I get close to dies.”

“... are you worried I’ll die?”

“Look, I push you away because it’s all I know how to do! Is that a good enough answer?”

“James. Please.”

“I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Don’t go.”

“Goodbye, Q.”


	5. Fatal Flaw

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes James talks to Q as the boffin sleeps in his arms.

**Prompt: “Your fatal flaw is loving a man like me. It’ll get you killed someday.**

 

“Q? Are you still awake?”

James's murmured words are met with a soft snore as Q curls into James's warmth. Well then. James pulls Q closer and drops a kiss to his hair. “You need your sleep. Those circles are getting darker. How long were you awake this time? Probably the whole time I was gone.”

The mission hadn't been easy, but James knows Q has a bad habit of not leaving the office when James is in the field, either. 

“Next time I’ll make sure Moneypenny checks on you more often. One of these days you'll just collapse if you're not careful.”

Q snuffles and sighs, looking more peaceful asleep than he ever does when awake.

“It gets harder. Going on each mission and leaving you back here. I know you're protected at Six, but there have been breaches before. If someone came for you…” he stops himself and swallows and holds Q a little tighter. Q nuzzles him in his sleep, and a bit of the tension in James's chest relaxes. 

“There was someone this time. He looked like you. He looked remarkably like you. Couldn't bloody save him either.” James's breath catches in his chest as he remembers the sight of the young man bleeding out from the shrapnel.

“You don't have any idea how much I care for you. But… oh Q, your fatal flaw is loving a man like me. It'll get you killed someday.”

Everyone else he's ever loved has died. Why should he believe it's in his power to protect the last great love of his life?


	6. Bomb Boo-Boo

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There's a very good reason Q is the Quartermaster for MI6. Don't cross him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags:
> 
> -minor swearing  
> -mentions of canon typical injury  
> -established relationship

**Prompt: “I’ve stood in hell and stared Satan in the eye. But frankly you scare me when you’re angry.”**

 

James walks into Q branch to find the place completely deserted. All the workstations are dark, and it’s only three in the afternoon. Puzzled, he wanders through, checking Q’s office before giving up on seeing his partner before heading home. Three months of forced leave while recovering from severe burns, shrapnel wounds, and damaged eardrums have left James feeling antsy and in need of some action; however, thoughts of having Q over his desk immediately leave his mind when he sees the note on a post-it stuck to Q’s computer.

_R and D. Blast testing. Come by if you drop in. -Q_

Curious, James walks to R and D to find every single minion there in hushed silence. He sees Q through the crowd and is about to get his attention when he realizes what is going on. Because he recognizes the minion standing in front of the Quartermaster.

This particular minion was responsible for James’s injuries on his last mission; the bomb James had used to destroy the bad guy’s hideout had been faulty. The coding inside the device had a small error that changed the numbers on the blast radius, and James had ended up on the edge of the kill zone. His disguise had helped take most of the explosion, but Medical had done one hell of a job stitching him back up and replacing burned skin.

James watches as the minion turns, shaking, and walks into a testing chamber while Q watches. Q is stone-faced, eyes ice cold and steely as he locks the door and instructs the two technicians behind the desk to start the test. Peering through the window, James sees the same bomb he had used in the testing chamber. The floor is clearly marked for the “kill zone”.

Frowning, he taps on a technician’s shoulder. “What’s going on?”

The woman looks up and goes slightly pink. “Ah, it’s Q’s orders, 007. He’s had Johnson on explosion coding since your… accident. He has to be in the test chamber when the device he’s check the codes for is detonated. If he’s done his job… then he should be safe.”

No wonder Johnson looks like he might shit himself. The man in the test chamber is shaking violently now and sweating bullets as he stares unblinking at the bomb. Numbers pop up on screens all around the room, counting down from ten. James sneaks a look at Q; he is unmoving.

James turns his attention back to the bomb, watching as it explodes safely. When the smoke vents from the room, Johnson is unscathed… apart from a definite stain on his trousers. He practically scrambles from the room and bolts for the Q-branch toilets as the other minions head back to their workstations. Only then does Q notice James standing there. “Come to see the show?”

Chuckling, James pulls Q in for a quick kiss. “You know,” he says, “I’ve stood in hell and stared Satan in the eye... But frankly, _you_ scare me when you’re angry.”


	7. Lingering Loss

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's hard to lose the one you love.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags:
> 
> -MCD  
> -language  
> -angst  
> -1st person

**Prompt: “I go on drives with the windows down to get the smell of you out of the car. But it’s still there.” + Angst Prompt Table- MCD**

 

You’d think six months on that I would be able to think your name without breaking down… but no. Fuck, I go on drives with the windows down to get the smell of you out of the car. But it’s still there.

Your scent lingers in the leather like your kisses would against my cheek. So I roll down the windows and drive as fast as I can out of London and into the country. Even the city smells like you and your bloody cologne.

I found a bottle of it in the glove compartment. I nearly threw it out the window, but it’s in my satchel. I can’t quite bear to let it go yet. But I have to get the smell out of the car.

Maybe I’ll take the car apart. Rebuild her again. I did it once for you. She drives even better now. You would almost smile when you said that. The day we took the picnic, remember? The day we danced in the rain.

I’m going to put the cologne on the mantle with your ashes.

The cats miss you. They look for you.

I’m looking too.


	8. Whiskey Wishes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> James doesn't deal well with betrayal... though very few people do.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags:
> 
> -betrayal  
> -angst  
> -alcoholism  
> -swearing

**Prompt: “You can’t tape a broken heart back together with whiskey, you know.” + Angst Prompt Table- Betrayal**

 

He shouldn’t be surprised anymore when this happens. The one lesson his life seems to be trying to teach him is that no one can be trusted, but after his fifth (eighth?) drink, he feels less willing to learn and more interested in breaking something.

James doesn’t notice at first when Felix sits down on the stool next to him, and it’s only when Felix orders the same martini James is drinking that he glances at the other man.

“You look like shit, my friend,” Felix murmurs, meeting James’s gaze.

James just grunts and finishes his drink.

“Look, I know things went south fast. I was already on my way here when I heard. Eve told me where to find you in case you needed someone by your side.”

Again, James doesn’t answer. He doesn’t need this right now. All he wants to do is get blackout drunk and forget. So he switches from martinis to whiskey, starting with a double.

“You can’t tape a broken heart back together with whiskey, you know.”

“And what the fuck would you know about it?” James hissed. He’d had just about enough of Felix’s meddling. “You didn’t come back from a job to find your lover screwing someone else in your bed.”

“No,” Felix replies quietly. “I didn’t. But I know how much it hurts. To be betrayed like that.”

“Fuck. Off.”

“No. Come on, you’re staying at mine tonight.”

“Not going anywhere.”

“Then you have two choices. Either you walk out of here with me, or I fight you and drag your sorry ass back to mine.”

James stares at Felix and sees the stony resolve behind thin wire glasses. He sighs, polishes off his whiskey, and gets up, following Felix out to a waiting cab.

The ride to the hotel is silent with James staring resolutely out the window and ignoring Felix, but he follows obediently when the cab pulls to a stop. Felix is only a few floors up, and the moment he’s through the door, James heads for the minibar.


	9. Punctured Promise

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The brain is a funny thing. You never know how it will heal.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags:
> 
> -alternate Post-Spectre  
> -injury  
> -implied homophobia  
> -broken hearts

**Prompt: “You promised you’d still love me when you came back.” + Angst Prompt Table- Injury**

 

It’s the first time Q can ever remember James being confined to Medical.

His body is covered in lacerations, some of them looking infected and beginning to smell. There’s a nasty wound on his head that has him barely conscious and muttering incoherently. One of his legs has a wound that’s bleeding through a tourniquet.

James is damned lucky to be alive, to have survived the helicopter crash.

***

He opens his eyes after three days in recovery. Q has spent every waking moment he could spare sitting by James’s side and just talking to him. He’s described the atmosphere at Six and all the little mundane things that are part of their work. Eve has been by, as have Tanner and Mallory. Even Alec had dropped in to check on James (even if he refused to admit that was the reason for his visit).

“People care so much about you, more than I think you may ever know or understand, James. And I do. I care. I love you.”

James’s eyes flicker. The heart monitor jumps up a few beats, and he opens his eyes to look at Q. Q feels his heart leap in his chest, realizing the full extent of his worry that James might not have pulled through. 

“James? Can you hear me? You’re awake, oh thank god you’re awake.” James blinks a few times then refocuses on Q’s face, and slowly the Quartermaster feels his stomach begin to sink. Because there’s nothing there. No excitement, not a flicker of anything. “James?”

“Why are you here?”

“What… what do you mean?”

“I mean why are you here? Why  _ you _ ?” The words are soft and clipped, but there’s a decided sharpness to them. Q half expects to feel a cut on his cheek.

“It’s me. It’s Q… Simon. You were on a mission and there was a crash. They pulled you from the helicopter and rushed you back here. We stopped them. Stopped Blofeld and Denbigh and all of them. Before you left… you promised you’d still love me when you came back.”

“Love  _ you _ ? Why? You’re a man.”

Q feels as though he’s been slapped. His eyes burn as he stands, unable to take another second of the burning hatred in James’s eyes. Q turns and runs, leaving James to his sick bed and his cruelty.


	10. Sorrowful Swim

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You can't keep someone from their true nature forever.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags:
> 
> -angst  
> -AU  
> -magic  
> -goodbye

**Prompt: “ I’m not always going to be here waiting for you.” + Angst Prompt Table- Transformation + AU**

 

As he has done every day for the past three years, Q is sitting by the window watching for James to return home from work. His lover will walk through the door, they’ll share a passionate kiss, eat dinner together, and have wonderful, electrifying sex. They have a routine, and everything is happy.

Almost.

Q opens the window to smell the salty tang of the sea air as it wafts up the Welsh cliffs and into the small cottage. His very being aches for the ocean. He can hear the sea’s call on that same wind, and a soft whimper of longing escapes him. He hasn’t been in the water for three years, but he’s been with James, and isn’t that enough? Can’t that just be enough? If he ever manages to return, James won’t be able to follow him. He’ll never see James again, never make him laugh, never hold him… and he tries. Q tries so desperately hard to be content.

But now he’s sitting by the window weeping as the sea calls to him, and that is how James finds him. He gathers Q into his arms and holds him close as his lover cries. “What is it? What’s wrong.”

“I… I’m not always going to be here waiting for you.” As soon as he speaks them, he knows the words are true. He has to start looking in earnest now, for as much as he loves James, he  _ needs _ the ocean.

James holds him a little tighter, a little more protective than he had been a second before. “Come on. Let’s get you a bath and some food. You know how food always helps.”

Q nods and follows him through the cottage. James draws him a bath and brings him food, joining him in the water and feeding him by hand. Q wills himself to relax; he prays to every being he has ever believed in to grant him the ability to live happily on land, but it doesn’t come.

He waits until James is asleep that night before searching the entire house. He tests every floorboard, every nook and cranny, and when he opens the attic, he can feel it. Q scrambles up and dives for the cedar chest, and there, nestled inside, is what he’s been searching for.

Q carries it back downstairs as he checks it over for any tears or stains, but no. It’s as pristine as the day he took it off. He slips into their room (James’s room, he reminds himself) and leans down to press a final kiss to James’s lips as he sleeps. “I love you,” he whispers, “and I’m sorry.”

He leaves then, running for the ocean and shedding his clothes as he follows the narrow path down the cliff to the sea. When he reaches the beach, he unfolds his parcel and puts it on.

Had anyone been watching, all they would’ve seen is a dark brown selkie slipping back into the water.


	11. Pub Ponderings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> People can be so inconsiderate when they fight in public places

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags:
> 
> -none really

**Prompt: “I could have loved you like that.”**

 

Three days back in England from his most recent mission, and James takes Q out for a bite at the local pub. They’re sitting comfortably at their table, having tucked into a heaping portion of shepherd’s pie and washed it down with a pint each. They’re sipping their second round now while Q enjoys his pudding when the couple at the table next to them breaks into a row.

“You never have an idea of where to go. It’s always ‘what about the pub’? We never go anywhere nice.”

“This is nice! They do toasties here!”

“Ugh, you’re impossible. My mum was right. You never really grew up did you?”

“Grow up? I can show you growing up. How about this- I’ll quit smoking. Just chuck the ciggies in the bin.”

“I could have loved you like that,” Q says nonchalantly as he takes a huge bite of his pudding.

James snorts into his pint. “Thank God you don’t. I’d have to drown you in the Thames.” 

“Oh, does that mean you love me too?”

It’s quick, just a flicker of the eyes to meet Q’s and then James suddenly seems to find his pint very fascinating. Q’s lip twitches, and he finishes his pudding. He then drains his glass and stands, pulling on his coat. “Come on then, you can walk me home.”

James finishes his pint and follows suit, silently accompanying Q in the short walk back to his flat. Q’s words are still buzzing in his head, though he refuses to share his thoughts aloud. Words can lie. Words lie all the time. And it had been so casual… he hadn’t been prepared to hear that.

_ Oh, does that mean you love me too? _

Can he even love? Is it within his capacity to do so? He had thought he’d loved Vesper, and that had left him empty inside. But here is Q, marvelous, brilliant, wicked Q. Q who never lies with his words. Q who is open and honest with his body. Q who can read him better than anyone else in the world. Q… who feels like home.

Maybe it does mean that after all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The row may be inspired just a tad by "Shaun of the Dead", one of my all time favorite British comedies. Just imagine Shaun and Liz fighting...


	12. Choice Consequences

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> James was never really going to be all right with retirement.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags:
> 
> -angst  
> -00Swann  
> -isolation

**Prompt: “Just leave. It was easy enough for you the first time.” + Angst Prompt Table- Isolation**

 

God he’s bored.

James lays in bed next to Madeleine and stares up at the ceiling. Two months into his “retirement” and he’s just so fucking  _ bored _ . Bored of vacation, bored of Madeleine.

Just. Fucking. Bored.

His problem is that he doesn’t really have any place to go. His childhood home is rubble, and London officially has too many memories for him to go back there and be happy. James slips his arm out from under Madeleine and walks to the window. He stares out over the Swiss Alps, not really seeing anything.

What had started in the heat of a mission, that connection he’d thought he had with the girl had fizzled for him almost as soon as they arrived. Madeleine works in the clinic during the day, and James spends his time skiing and drinking. He spends his nights in her bed, but his mind, his heart, they aren’t in it. The problem, he supposes, is that he went back for the car.

If he hadn’t gone for the car…

_ “I thought you’d gone.” _

_ “I have. There’s just one thing I need.” _

_ “You changed your mind?” _

_ “Changed it about what?” _

_ “You’re still leaving with her, then.” _

_ “I thought that was obvious.” _

That exchange plays in his head every night, haunting him. There had been hurt in Q’s eyes, a hurt that shouldn’t have been there. They had never been serious. Q’s flat had been a place to stop between missions, nothing more. Q had merely been a distraction. He thought that had been clear.

But now the hurt in Q’s eyes only drives him further apart from Madeleine. So James has to choose…

***

“Why are you here?”

“I thought that was obvious.”

“You left. You left with her. You left and that was it.”

“Q, we were never serious-”

“Maybe you weren’t. Maybe you didn’t care. But I’m not a double-oh, remember? I actually have feelings.”

“Q-”

“No. Just go. It was easy enough for you the first time.”

***

London is just a stopping place now, another city that doesn’t feel like home. It belongs to Q and MI6. There are too many memories here, just like Venice. James pulls his coat tighter and turns the collar up as a gust of icy air buffets him. Even after Vesper he’d assumed he would be able to come back to England, escape from his past even if just for a short while. Now he’s looking to escape London, and that narrows his list of destinations considerably. There’s hardly a country left where he hasn’t left destruction in his wake.

He’d left Madeleine without so much as a note, and now Q had turned him out. Eve isn’t speaking to him, and Tanner’s busy with his family. James would need a place to stay for the night, maybe pull someone at a club for a quick fuck and a bed. Or maybe just travel. Say fuck it and leave again. M always said orphans make the best recruits because they have no one important, no family or friends. He has never felt more like an orphan in his life.

James stops at a corner and hails a cab., grateful for the warmth after the frigid London air.

“Where to?”

“Heathrow Airport.”


	13. Blofeld Bomb

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> License to kill in the wrong hands?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags:
> 
> -dark!James  
> -kidnapping  
> -angst  
> -physical violence

**Prompt: “So… how are you brothers?!?!” + Angst Prompt Table- Capture**

 

The first thing he feels is pain, a sharp ache in his right temple. Then he tastes blood, tangy and metallic. His cheek stings too; he must’ve bit it when he was hit in the head- _ shit _ . Q has enough wherewithal to not move as he comes to, memories flooding back. He’d been feeding the cats when the door opened, and he had looked up to see-

“Hello, Q.”

He opens his eyes, squinting to focus until someone puts his glasses on. “So I didn’t imagine you knocking me out, then,” Q says quietly. He’s still dressed at least, but he’s bound hand a foot to a hard backed wooden chair. The rest of the room is in shadow, save for a pool of light centered on him.

James’s face comes into view, and there is nothing kind in those eyes, none of the usual flirting or teasing that Q has come to expect from the agent, not even a hint of a smile. “No, you didn’t.”

“You couldn’t have just used chloroform like a good kidnapper?”

“Oh come now, little one, is that any way to talk to your kidnapper?”

Q stiffens slightly, turning towards the new voice as best he can. Another man strides into view, a bit shorter than James, but with short blond hair almost the same color. The new man is smiling, the expression not reaching his eyes. “Who are you?” Q asks. He has to stall for time. His own tracker would be sending his location to MI6, and the longer he can keep them talking, the greater the chance that someone will be able to find him.

“Me? Franz Oberhauser. But you know that already, clever boy. Just like you know that your tracker is already gone.” The man stands right in front of Q with James at his right hand. He slides up the right sleeve of Q’s cardigan to reveal a bandage. “That little beauty is on a plane to Australia right now.” Oberhauser chuckles and straightens Q’s glasses. “And you already know my brother.”

Six words, six very simple words, but Q can’t completely hide his shock. “So…  _ how _ are you two brothers?!?!” he whispers.

“It’s very simple. My father took in James when he was orphaned. He helped me kill the old man by staging an avalanche. He’s been my partner ever since.”

For a moment, Q’s certain his heart has stopped. He glances over at James, and again there’s no change in expression. James may as well have been carved in stone. “So why kidnap me?”

“Oh but that’s so easy. Haven’t you worked it out yet?” Oberhauser leans in, his lips almost brushing Q’s ear. “Because  _ you _ will bring the world to its knees. And then you will take the fall.”

“And if I refuse?”

Oberhauser chuckles and steps back, taking Q’s glasses with him. James takes his place. His arm moves fast enough that Q doesn’t see it happen. He only feels his head snap to the side as pain blooms on his cheek. He can taste blood again, fresh this time. “So it’s to be torture,” Q spits. “I can handle torture.”

Another blow lands, and then another, until his face is a mass of bruises. Q spits out blood onto the ground. “You know I’m not going to help you.”

Oberhauser’s face swims into view, grinning. “You will. Everyone breaks eventually.”

***

When he got free, and he would, James would regret ever doing this to him. There wouldn’t be anything left of the agent when he was finished. Q would make sure of that.


	14. Time Trap

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Usually just one is captured, but both Boffin and Agent are in trouble.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags:
> 
> -peril  
> -angst  
> -dialogue only

**Prompt: “I… I missed you. So much.” + Angst Prompt Table- Helplessness**

 

“We should go someplace warm. Someplace with sun.”

“You? Asking for sun?”

“I know, it seems silly, but hear me out. I’ll even let you take me shopping for swimming trunks.”

“Am I allowed to pick where we go?”

“Absolutely. You know all the best beaches.”

“Mmmmm, I do.”

“James?”

“Yes, Simon?”

“I… I missed you. So much. And I’m sorry. This is all my fault.”

“Don’t think about it. I’ll get us out of here. Somehow.”

“James, if we die-”

“Don’t you dare-”

“No, listen to me. If we die, I don’t blame you. It was my fault.”

“I am  _ going _ to get us out of here.”

“James… he didn’t tell you?”

“Tell me what?”

“I’m going to be dead in a few minutes… poison… before he brought you in…”

“ _ What _ ?”

“I’m sorry. I didn’t… this isn’t your fault… I love you…”

“Simon? SIMON! I’ll get us out. I’ll do it. I have to. Hold on… Hold on.”


	15. Silly Songbird

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Every business has to have some kind of holiday party.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags:
> 
> -fluff  
> -JAQ  
> -established relationship  
> -holiday party  
> -karaoke

**Prompt: “I don’t do karaoke.” + JAQ**

 

There have been tales of the MI6 Christmas Party. Every year it’s a little different, but the premise is always the same. All agents and boffins, all desk jockeys and technicians, even the higher ups like M are invited. IT’s an evening to socialize and let down, provided there’s no international crisis, of course.

There’s a bar, though after James Bond’s first year with MI6, it’s no longer an open bar. The only pictures left from that night are kept in a special locked compartment of M’s desk, but those who attended still smile at the memory. There’s a reason James doesn’t drink tequila anymore.

With the introduction of Eve Moneypenny to the staff, they added a karaoke bar to the mix. You can always find at least half a dozen double-ohs and a few minions waiting for their turn to sing terrible renditions of popular hits.

This is the first year that Q will be attending the party. Normally, he stays home with a large glass of wine to binge watch a show, but this year he’s dating two double-oh agents. They arrive like a fuzzy trifecta, wearing dress slacks and horrible jumpers instead of tuxedos. Alec has even wrestled a pair of light-up antlers onto Q’s head.

“Sometimes I really hate you,” Q grumbles as Alec hands him a drink.

“No you don’t. You love me. Now. What song are you treating us to tonight?”

“I’ve told you. I don’t do karaoke.”

“And you lost the bet. So you have to do one song.” James kisses his cheek and nudges him towards the DJ. “Go on.”

Q stalks off, muttering under his breath about idiot boyfriends.

***

Forty-five minutes later, Q finds himself onstage with a microphone in his hand. Still mentally cursing James and Alec, he scans the crowd. He spots them easily, and they both raise their glasses. The music starts, and bloody hell he knows it’s a cheesy choice, but he’s not going to be the only one embarrassed at this event.

_ “It’s a little bit funny, this feeling inside _

_ I’m not one of those who can easily hide, I _

_ Don’t have much money but boy, if I did _

_ I’d buy a big house where we both could live.” _

As he finds his rhythm in the song, some of his nerves begin to drop away. He’s staring right at James and Alec as he sings, and they’re no longer giving him their smug smiles. Both men are wearing genuine expressions of pride and love on their faces. And in that moment, it’s more than enough.

_ “My gift is my song _

_ And this one’s for you _

_ And you can tell everybody this is your song _

_ It may be quite simple but now that it’s done _

_ I hope you don’t mind _

_ I hope you don’t mind _

_ That I put down in words _

_ How wonderful life is while you’re in the world.” _

By the time he finishes singing, Q’s actually having fun in spite of himself. Everyone cheers for him as he steps down, and both James and Alec greet him with deep, eager kisses.

“That was very well done.”

“You’ve been hiding that particular talent.”

“Well I can’t let you both know all my secrets, now can I?”


	16. Trevelyan Teasing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's hard to figure out how to ask a double-oh on a date.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags:
> 
> -teasing  
> -Alec and Q are friends

**Prompt: “Don’t change for him. He’s not worth it.”**

 

“Oh my god he didn’t!”

Alec laughs and eats another dumpling. “You bet he did. Shagged them both and barely broke a sweat. Got all the information we needed for the mission too.”

Q shakes his head and sips his wine. “I’ve missed this. It’s been ages since we just… caught up. How’ve you been?”

“Are you asking as my Quartermaster?”

“No, you prat. As your friend. And as… someone interested in dating your ex.”

Alec raises an eyebrow. “Who, James?”

“Maybe. If you’re not comfortable with it I can drop it.”

“No, no. Maybe. I hadn’t thought of the two of you together.”

“I’ve just not been sure how to… start things. With you it’s easy. You have a penchant for wine and bad jokes. James is… he’s more guns and action and very few words. I could try being more taciturn-”

“Don’t change for him. He’s not worth it.”

Q glances at his friend, frowning until Alec cracks a smile. “Oh you fucking wanker.”

“Come on, you’re both my friends. I can’t crack a few? Seriously though. Be yourself. I have it on good authority he likes your arse in your trousers.”

“Is that a fact?”

“It is. You should meet him at a pub. Have it be public. Get some pints and some chips. He loves billiards.”

“Does he now…”


	17. Tempting Tentacles

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, there's a reason James should never be sent to Japan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags:
> 
> -tentacle porn  
> -rimming  
> -basically a porn chapter
> 
> This is my attempt at tentacle porn... it's also in full consent. So, consentacles. 
> 
> Blame 007 fest and their porn prompt table.

**Prompt: “Where the fuck are my underwear?” + Porn Prompt Table- Consentacles**

 

“James, where the fuck are my underwear?”

Q is standing in their room with a towel around his waist as he stares at the pyjamas he had laid out not ten minutes before. His pants are most definitely missing from the carefully folded clothes. James is lying down on the bed with his arms behind his head feigning innocence.

“If you’ve destroyed another pair-”

“Relax, Q. They’re perfectly safe. Besides. I thought you said earlier you were up for a little…  _ experiment _ .”

***

Q can hear his heart pounding in his ears as he hears James move about the room. The blindfold effectively blocks out all light in the room, and the leather cuffs attaching him to the bed are soft enough to not chafe too badly should he try and struggle. “Are you sure about this? Do you even know if it’s safe?”

“I spent long enough in Japan to see what this could do. And you know that all you have to do is safeword and I’ll stop.” Q feels James kiss his forehead, then his lips. “Are you ready?”

“Just think of it like sensory play, right?”

“Exactly.”

The mattress dips as James kneels between Q’s legs, and Q takes a slow, deep breath. He’s waiting now, straining to hear. He knows James’s arms will be transforming, and he can hear it too, the soft slithering that should frighten him but doesn’t. Bloody hell, it had startled him the first time it had happened. But now that he’s run tests and knows it is neither permanent nor catching, he’s curious. It’s the scientist in him.

The first brush of tentacles against his skin happens on his arm. It’s fascinating, knowing what they look like but not being able to see. They aren’t slimy as he’d once thought. They’re soft, cool to the touch, a deep grey on the top and a lighter grey underneath where the suckers are. He shivers as goosebumps run up his arm to his shoulder. 

Then there are tentacles on his left arm, brushing up in tandem with the others. The tentacles reach his shoulders and brush down his chest to his nipples.

Q arches and bites his lip, moaning softly as his nipples pebble under James’ touch. “They feel-feel more sensitive than usual,” he murmurs.

“Mmmmm, I thought they might.”

Then it’s as if everything goes from not enough to far too much. In one swift movement, James swallows his cock completely and the tentacles on his chest begin to pinch and pull at Q’s nipples. Q arches again, groaning and pulling against his restraints as he says James’ name over and over again. Too much, oh god too much already, how is he even this turned  _ on _ \- and then it levels out. He adjusts to the new level of pleasure and exhales sharply as James pulls off his cock with an obscene slurp.

“I didn’t tell you everything.”

“Wait, what?”

“So my arms and hands can transform… but so can my tongue.”

Q has almost no warning before James nudges his legs open wider and licks at his hole. Q can  _ feel _ James’s tongue turn from muscle to tentacle and slip inside him with great ease. His cock throbs once, and he can feel the tentacle tense slightly, firming up to be more stiff, and then he’s fucking himself in earnest on James’ tentacle tongue. His nipples are aching now to the point he almost doesn’t notice that one of James’s arms has now turned its attention to his cock. It’s stroking and caressing it, sliding the tip of one tendril over the steadily leaking head.

The longer it lasts, the more aroused he gets, and the more it seems like James has a neverending supply of tentacles. There must be at least five coming from each of his arms now because he can feel them everywhere. There are two of them holding his legs apart while James tongue fucks him, at least two more on his nipples, several more on his cock, even two teasing the sensitive flesh of his neck with their suckers. But it isn’t until the tentacle inside him finds his prostate and starts to prod it in earnest that Q has any warning he’s about to come. His toes curl, his balls tighten, and then he’s yelling James’s name as he comes harder than he ever has in his life. All he can see are flashes of light and color behind his eyelids, and he whines as all the tentacles retract.

James undoes the bindings and the blindfold then, scooping Q up into his arms. “You did so well,” he purrs, pressing kisses all over Q’s face as he curls up with his lover snuggled against him.

“Did you…?”

“Later. That was all about you.”

“Mmmm… was good. Better than I thought.”

“I do aim to please.”

“Still want to know what the fuck you did with my underwear though.”


	18. Carnal Challenge

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Q knows just how to keep their love life interesting.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags:
> 
> \- NSFW  
> \- mild BDSM  
> \- praise kink  
> \- Bottom!James

**Prompt: “Who the hell does that at your age?” + Porn Prompt Table- Coming Untouched**

 

Every nerve ending in his body feels like it is on fire. James fights to hold still as Q twists the vibrator slowly, thrusting it in another inch.

“Don’t move your hands.”

“Yes, Sir.”

“Good boy.” Q leans up and kisses him, flicking the toy up a notch. The vibrations are loud enough James can hear them easily, but the toy is still nowhere near where he wants it. Q is smirking as he teases James. “You want it so badly don’t you?”

“Yes,” James groans as he clenches around the toy. “Yes, Sir. I do, Sir.”

“What do you want, boy? Hmmm?”

“What-whatever you’ll give me, Sir.”

Q turns the toy up to the third setting and angles it just deep enough to lightly brush James’ prostate. “That’s right, pet. Whatever I want to give you is what you get. And what I want,” he purrs, “is for you to come tonight without a hand on your cock. Can you do that for me, boy?”

James feels his face flush at the order. He hasn’t done that in years, but if Q doesn’t stop this torment, he just might succeed. “Am-am I allowed to come on your cock?”

“Good boys get to eat their rewards. Are you a good boy?”

Oh. Holy. Christ. “ _ Yes,  _ Sir.”

“Then you’ll come when I tell you.” And Q begins to thrust the vibrator, twisting it as it circles James’ prostate, pressing it against the sensitive bundle of nerves that sent James into suppressed spasms of pleasure. James continues gripping the headboard for support as his toes curl desperately.

“Please, oh fuck, please Sir.”

“Please what, pet?”

“Please let me come.  _ Please _ .”

Q seems to think about it for a moment, eyeing James’ cock while he thinks. It’s red and leaking steadily against James’ belly from all the teasing. “All right. But if you don’t come now, you don’t get to tonight.” And he turns the toy all the way up to the highest setting and presses it hard against James’ prostate.

The last thing James remembers is shouting Q’s name as he comes harder than he has in his entire life.

***

“You did not.” Alec looks dumbfounded as he stares at James.

“Yes I did.”

“Who the hell does that at your age?”

“You should try having someone as insatiable as Q for a lover. Besides, you know how I respond to praise.”


	19. Stamina Serum

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> See, this is what happens when Q uses James as a guinea pig.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags:
> 
> -anal  
> -bareback  
> -swearing  
> -NSFW  
> -This is my attempt at a "sex pollen" type of idea.

**Prompt: “If you think I’m going to let you keep that, you’re out of your mind.” + Porn Prompt Table- Sex Pollen**

 

It starts with James on a treadmill.

Q’s seated behind the observation glass in the MI6 fitness testing room watching James run on the treadmill before him. Screens on the desk beside his chair monitor James’ heart rate and various hormone levels from little wireless patches Q had attached to James’s chest a few minutes earlier.

“I’m afraid you’ll have to take your shirt off. The fabric interferes with the sensors.”

James had just smirked and taken off his tight, navy blue shirt, dropping it on the floor as Q attached the sensor patches to his now bare skin. That skin now glistens with a light sheen of sweat covering James’ chest as he jogs in place.

Q’s in the process of testing a new stamina enhancing serum he’s developing that could help increase physical stamina in the field and make it easier for agents who are flagging to push through to the end of missions. With James as his guinea pig, he hopes to have all the results he needs by the end of the week. He has several endurance trials scheduled for today alone: jogging, pull ups, push ups, and swimming. Tomorrow will be fight training and the extreme firing range. He also plans for cycling and rowing before the week is out. And he gets to watch James through  _ everything _ .

Right now, James is only dressed in grey sweatpants and ratty trainers as he jogs. Q’s eyes follow a particular bead of sweat as it trickles between James’ pecs, and he licks his lips involuntarily. He and James have only been together a few weeks, mostly between James’ last two missions, and he’s not really sure what to call what they have. A tiny part of him hopes it’ll bloom into something more, that the physical side will only enhance their natural chemistry… but he sighs and tries to put that thought out of his mind. He refuses to push or move too quickly. The last thing he needs to do is frighten James away.

His sensors choose that moment to detect something new, and his monitor begins beeping. Jarred from his reverie, Q checks James’ vitals and notices something… odd. He’s experiencing a spike in testosterone, much higher than what he normally has when running. Q glances back at James and finds his eyes riveted to James’ crotch. Because James Bond is currently running with a boner.

The sweats do little to hide the erect cock, though Q suspects James’ briefs may have something to do with containing the rapidly swelling erection. It’s bouncing too, up and down, with every step. Jesus, James might actually even be a little bigger than normal, but why? Q examines his hypotheses and the formula for the serum, frowning. Nothing in the serum should be doing this, but James doesn’t usually get hard from exercise unless that exercise involves chasing a naked Q around his flat.

“All right, Bond. That’s enough.”

Q walks out from the observation room and towards James, so intent on his experiment that he fails to notice the heat in James’ eyes. Before Q can open his mouth to speak, James grabs him and drags him into the nearest cupboard, slamming the door and pinning Q to the wall. Q looks up now, staring into the face of a very horny agent.

“This is hardly professional-”

“Fuck professional,” James snarls before crushing their mouths together in a very heated kiss. He invades Q’s mouth with his tongue, and he pins Q’s wrists against one of the shelves above his head. Q has no choice but to submit to his lover, and James’ hand finds his cock, palming him through his trousers. Q groans into James’ mouth.

Then, as quick as it started, James stops kissing Q and spins him around, kicking his legs out to the side and pulling his arse against James’ crotch. Q gasps to feel how hard James is against him, and James is grinding against him slowly, deliberately. “Fuck. Trousers off. Now,” Q orders.

James obeys, dropping his sweats and pants and yanking Q’s trousers down around his ankles. He spreads Q’s arse cheeks and slides his cock between them, grinding between the pale, pert muscles. “Lube,” James growls.

“Your lucky day. Right trouser pocket,” Q groans. He feels James reach for it, and then hears the cap of the small bottle pop open. “Shit! Cold,” he whines when James dribbles it between his cheeks and starts to work it into him with two fingers. Q’s still sensitive from the night before, but he can feel the waves of lust rolling off of James, and he’s hard now too. Q strokes himself slowly with a muffled groan. “Fuck. Fucking need you.”

In response, James bites his neck above the collar, sucking a deep purple mark into the skin while fingering Q’s prostate. Q’s vision goes spotty as he bites his lip to keep from crying out in pleasure. There’s three fingers in him now, insistent, thrusting but not quite enough. “For fuck’s sake, just fuck me already,” he snaps.

James licks the mark and spreads Q’s cheeks again, and now Q can feel him pressing, so he bears down and James slides right in. “Shit. Fuck. Oh fuck,” Q whines. James is panting in his ear, and as he begins to thrust, James bites him again, a little higher on the neck this time. Q feels James’s fingers dig into his hips and pull him back when James thrusts forward, and  _ fuck _ that’s good. There’s no sound for several minutes other than grunting, the slap of skin on skin, and the obscene wet sounds of James’ well lubed cock disappearing into Q over and over again. It’s all Q can do to grip the shelves for dear life as James fucks him roughly. Every time he thinks James is done leaving another hickey, James bites a new patch of skin. His neck aches with new bruises, and his cock slaps against his belly with every thrust. He tries to reach down and stroke himself, but James grabs his wrist and pulls it behind him. James waits for Q to hold his wrist there before reaching around and stroking Q himself. He twists expertly, even flicks the head the way Q likes it.

Q is rutting into James’ hand now, and James shifts his angle just enough to slam into Q’s prostate at the same moment that he grips the base of Q’s cock. Q goes from about to come to extreme sexual frustration mixed with agonizing pleasure. He bites his cardigan to muffle his shouts as James tortures him with intense sexual torture. Q can’t even get enough air into his lungs to beg for James to have mercy, and as he starts to think he might pass out from the intensity of it, James starts stroking him again and Q comes instantly. His vision blurs as James milks his cock and his prostate in tandem, and then he feels James follow, his hot, sticky release filling Q.

It takes a few minutes for Q to regain control of his body and for James to slip out of him. He opens his mouth to complain about the mess that’ll be in his trousers when from nowhere James produces a plug and slides it easily into Q. Q turns around to stare at James incredulously, and amazingly, that heated gaze is still there. “You’re not spent? And where the hell did you get a plug?”

“My sweats have pockets,” James says, though he doesn’t pull it off as innocently as he might otherwise. “And if you think I’m going to let you keep that, you’re out of your mind,” he adds.

“And why is that?”

“Because I bought it and I get to use it on you. Only me.” James produces a remote and clicks it on, sending vibrations throughout Q’s body. “And you’re wearing it until we get home.”

“Sh-shit. I’ll get-I’ll get my-ah!-oh fuck it. Get the car.”


	20. Golf Gaff

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Turns out Q really doesn't understand just how much James loves golf.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags:
> 
> -snark  
> -banter  
> -suggestive language  
> -the worst come on line ever James I swear to god

**Prompt: “You look like a clown in those trousers.”**

 

It’s those damn puppy eyes, Q thinks as he squints in the sunlight. They get him every time. And this time, they’ve landed him on a fucking golf course.

When he had moved out of his parents’ home, he had sworn to himself no more golf, never again. And no, he shouldn’t have made fun of James’ golf outfit, but christ, plaid trousers with a polo shirt that does not have a single matching color? With pristine golf shoes and a bloody sun visor to complete the looks? How could he not?

He’s regretting it now. James had gone all out. Q’s hair is partially hidden beneath a soft cap in a ridiculous brown (that matches the brown of his fucking saddle shoes). James didn’t even let him wear full trousers. He’s in these horrid plaid shorts and a polo shirt. To his eternal shame, his socks even reach all the way to his knees.

“I feel like a fucking public school prig,” he grumbles as he lines up for the first hole.

“You know you look like a clown in those trousers.”

“First, these aren’t trousers. Second, it’s cheating when you use my words against me. Third, you look like a prick in that visor.” Q takes his swing, sending the ball within two meters of the flag. He glances at James to see the surprise there. “Thought I’d be shite at golf?”

“Is there anything you aren’t good at?”

“Well I’m definitely better at clothes shopping than you.”

“I agree to disagree,” says James as he takes his swing, the ball landing a bit further from the flag than Q’s.

“What do I get if I beat you at this?”

“The satisfaction of besting me at sport?”

“No, I want something tangible.”

“You’re not touching my golf wardrobe.”

“Wouldn’t dream of it, darling. But what do I _win_?”

"What do you want to win?"

“Loser buys dinner at the winner’s choice of restaurant.”

James smirks and adjusts his visor. “Very well. I hope you can afford lobster.”

“Cocky for someone who will only make par on this hole.”

“I make par on your hole most nights.”

“..... I’m not dignifying that with a response.”

***

They tied. James bought dinner.


	21. Sleepy Sneak

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Q needs hugs and sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags:
> 
> -This is basically fluff.

**Prompt: “You’re not as quiet as you think you are.”**

Q disables the alarm in record time despite his sleep deprivation and closes the door without a sound. The flat is dark and quiet, and it’s late enough at night that the cats don’t come to greet their primary human as he takes off his shoes and hangs up his coat. His messenger bag ends up in a chair, and Q strips as he moves through the flat.

James is already in bed asleep, and Q stands in the doorway to watch James breathe for a moment. He’s really home. Everything’s okay. Three straight days of panic and constant adrenaline have left Q drained and relieved that all his agents are coming home safely. He hasn’t seen James for what seems like weeks, but he knows somewhere in his exhausted brain that it’s probably just been a day or two. Between 004 nearly being assassinated in China and 008 and 009 blowing up what felt like half of South America, Q’s had his hands more than full. And right now, he just wants to sleep and curl up with his boyfriend.

He drops his trousers and pants to the floor, remembering to pull off his socks as well, before slipping into bed and sighing.

“You’re not as quiet as you think you are.”

Q starts, looking at James who rolls over with a yawn to greet him. “I thought you were asleep.”

“Mmm, yes but there’s also no rest for the wicked.”

“I’m too tired for sex, darling. I just need to sleep.”

James wraps Q in a tight hug, drawing him close and kissing the top of his head. “I know. I can wait. I’m very patient.”

 _I had something for this_ , Q thinks as he yawns wide enough to pop his jaw before he closes his eyes. He’s asleep in seconds, and James keeps holding him until all the tension is gone from Q’s body.

“I’m glad you’re home,” he whispers into Q’s hair before following him into sleep.


	22. Sexy Slow

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's hard to do anything during a heatwave.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags:
> 
> -anal sex  
> -ice cubes  
> -banter  
> -NSFW

**Prompt: “You know, it’s funny. I’m certain that jacket looked better on my floor.” + Porn Prompt Table- Heat**

 

Sweat is dripping off Q’s face and onto James’ chest as he rides James’ cock as slowly as humanly possible. Only James would insist on having the windows closed in the middle of summer during a massive heat wave with  _ no working air conditioning _ . Q had even tried to protest that it was too hot for sex, but James had produced an ice cube, and, well, Q’s a scientist and wanted to know how James would use it.

Now he’s bracing himself with his hands on James’ shoulders as he clenches and grinds down with James rocking up to meet him, and  _ fuck _ but he loves this. He sees James reach for something, and Q doesn’t have a chance to react before another ice cube travels around his nipples. Q arches, throwing his head back and James snaps his hips sharply. “James!” Q whimpers, his cock aching. “James please.”

There’s ice in James’ hand when he strokes Q, and the cold of the ice mixed with the pressure from James’ hand and the cock in his arse all push Q over the edge. He comes with another stifled cry, and once James has pulled every drop from him, he rolls them over, spreading Q’s legs wide and driving into him. Every thrust sends waves of pleasure-pain through Q’s oversensitive body, and when James finally comes he’s nearly crying from it all.

He’s aware of James washing his body with a cool, damp flannel some time later, and Q blinks as he slowly focuses on James. “How long was I out?”

“Maybe five minutes. You’ve been praising my cock the whole time.”

Q feebly swats at James, but there’s no heat in the gesture. “You’re a cock.”

James chuckles and reaches for something, draping that something over Q’s naked body before laying back down. It takes a moment, but Q realizes James’ jacket from earlier (only  _ James _ would insist on wearing a bloody dinner jacket when the temperature is in the 30s) is spread over his chest.

“You know…” Q says, glancing at James, “it’s funny. I’m certain that jacket looked better on my floor. And it’s also too bloody hot for clothes. Why did  _ I _ get the only hotel room without air conditioning?”

“Because we had an image to maintain, one we have to keep up if this is going to work. I had to circumvent Eve somehow. She’s bloody tenacious about ‘protecting your honor’ the night before. And because you’re gorgeous and glistening now like a Grecian hero.”

“That may be the most poetic thing you’ve ever said.”

“You know how they used to pass time in Ancient Greece?”

“Oh fucking bite me, Bond.”

“Don’t mind if I do.”

“You’ll find ‘I do’ is my line.”

“Tomorrow it absolutely will be.”


	23. Agent Apology

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> James knows he's reckless, and he knows Q doesn't approve. Sometimes he's not sure how else he can best say sorry.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags:
> 
> -NSFW  
> -blowjob  
> -swearing

**Prompt: “You look good enough to eat.” + Porn Prompt Table- Biting**

 

James has been gone for nearly three weeks, three weeks of absolute hell. Not only has he lost or broken every piece of his kit, but he’s had too many close brushes with death to feel remotely settled in his own skin. He knows Q is furious with him for being “a thoughtless, reckless prick” as the Quartermaster had snapped at him the night before. So, upon his arrival at Six, James decides for once in his life to follow protocol. He reports to Medical for a checkup, then to M for a debriefing before making his way down to Q-branch. James has even taken the time to shower in the locker room and dress in one of his backup suits he always keeps at Six.

He arrives in Q-branch and the room instantly goes quiet. The minions stop typing and talking, and all heads turn in unison towards him and then towards Q’s office. James gives the minions a smile before soldiering forward and opening the door.

Q’s sitting at his desk, pretending not to notice James, and whatever James had been about to say vanishes from his mind. Q has never looked so handsome before. He’s in a deep green cardigan that James recognizes as the birthday present he’d given Q the previous month; it’s paired with dark slacks and sensible shoes. Q’s hair is in a semi-tamed nest atop his head, and he smells divine, like a mixture of his favorite soap, tea, and cologne. James closes the door and continues staring at Q until Q finally looks up to meet his gaze.

In a shared moment, both men agree silently to put the anger and fear and frustration that hangs between them aside for a moment. There will be time for that later. James crosses the room in two steps and pulls Q into his arms before crushing their mouths together in a kiss bound to bruise Q’s lips. James only breaks the kiss long enough to growl “Door” before pushing Q against the desk. He hears Q fumble for the switch, and a quick glance to the side shows the windows are already covered; Q had anticipated him, the minx.

James mouths his way over to Q’s ear and nibbles at the lobe before mouthing down Q’s neck. The skin is pale and smooth and utterly unblemished. Well, that won’t do at all. Without warning, James bites, sucking hard on the skin between his teeth as Q goes rigid in his arms. He knows Q is fighting the urge to moan, so James sucks a little harder, worries the skin a little more until Q is whimpering for him. He pulls back and licks the abused skin and admiring the mark.

“What’s gotten into you?” Q murmurs, running his fingers through James’ hair.

“You look good enough to eat,” James replies, kissing Q again and sliding to his knees.

He hears Q gasp as he quickly works to free Q from his trousers. Q isn’t fully hard yet, but James is determine to rectify that. He begins stroking slowly, one hand on the shaft and the other fondling Q’s balls. Q groans and grips the edge of his desk, making James smirk up at him.

James isn’t ready to talk about the mission with Q, but there’s part of him, the part of him agonizing over what he’s put Q through in recent weeks. He knows it shows when he looks up and locks eyes with Q because Q’s face softens slightly. It’s then that James begins to take his fully erect boyfriend into his mouth, and James loves this moment. He watches Q’s eyes roll back and treasures the soft groan of his own name. It’s such an intimate sound when Q whispers “James.”

He gets to work then, determined to suck every last drop out of Q and watching Q’s face as he does. James shifts a little closer and reaches around to grip both of Q’s buttocks, massaging them while he swallows around Q. Q’s fingers are gripping his shoulders tight enough to bruise, and James knows he’s resisting the urge to fuck James’ throat. Not that James would really mind that, but this is about an apology. He will happily submit to Q when they’re home and Q’s had dinner.

“James, fuck, James, won’t last like this.”

_ Good _ , James thinks as he redoubles his efforts. His head bobs back and forth, tongue swirling and licking Q’s cock, fingers gripping Q’s buttocks to hold him in place while James takes him completely into his throat and swallows. He has almost no warning before Q comes, pouring down his throat with a strangled cry. James swallows every drop Q gives him and continues sucking on Q until he’s completely soft before letting him go and nuzzling Q’s thigh. Q’s petting his hair now as James kisses Q’s thigh… and then bites it. He sucks a mark into the sensitive skin and hears a soft, “Buggering fuck” of surprise and pleasure. So, once he’s satisfied with the bruise, he turns his head and leaves a twin mark on the other thigh. No one but he and Q will know they’re there. He looks back up at Q and pulls him down for a softer kiss this time. “Like I said. Good enough to eat.”


	24. Needed Now

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes the mission affects James so much that he can barely hold it together. He seeks out the comfort of a warm body to get him through the night

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags:
> 
> -minor angst  
> -hurt/comfort  
> -first time together  
> -rimming  
> -anal sex  
> -banter
> 
> For timetospy. My beta, my friend. Thank you for pushing me to connect more deeply with the emotion.

**Prompt: “Normal people knock first.” + Porn Prompt Table- First Time**

 

Q wakes to the sound of glass clinking. There’s no shattering tinkle, so nothing’s broken, but it’s more the sound of a bottle against crystal. He doesn’t turn on the light but does put on his glasses, letting his eyes adjust to the dim moonlight from the window. There it is again, that firm clink of glass on glass. He rises silently, slips into his dressing gown, and grabs his taser before opening the door to his room.

The lamp next to the sofa is on, glowing more brightly as it warms up. James Bond sits there in a navy suit and pale grey tie with a large glass of scotch in his hand. Q recognizes the bottle on the table as one from his liquor cabinet.

“You know, normal people knock first,” Q says, his grip on the taser in his pocket easing.

“Since when have I been normal people?” James replies, eyeing his glass as if contemplating the deeper answers of life instead of amber liquid.

“How did you get past my alarm?”

“I used to break into M’s flat on a semi-regular basis.”

“That’s not an answer.”

“I’m a spy. It’s what I do.”

“I thought what you did was gleefully destroy all my equipment.”

Something flickers across James’ face, and Q isn’t quite sure what’s different all of a sudden, but something has changed.

“Why are you here?”

"Well… the bars were closed. And I figured you’d have decent scotch.” James eyes the bottle on the table. “Why don’t you have decent scotch?”

“My scotch is fine. It just happens to have been confiscated by a certain agent I work with.”

“Come have a drink with me. Right here on this sofa.” James pats the cushion next to him and gestures to an empty glass next to the bottle.

And then Q sees. James’ hand is trembling as he lifts the glass to his lips. Had there been ice in the drink, he’d have heard it. It would have been obvious. James isn’t supposed to be back from Istanbul until tomorrow; Q had booked the flight himself. Something must have happened to make him come back early and leave him not quite able to hide the damage from the mission.

Something inside Q cracks, and he decides to let his professional persona drop a little. He’s grown more than fond of James in the months since his return from “death”, and of all the places James could have gone, he’s come here. He’s come to Q.

Q sets the taser down a safe distance from James and joins him on the sofa. He fills the second glass and raises it with a little nod to James before drinking. It burns on the way down as Q is not accustomed to his drinks straight up. He coughs and sees James’ lip twitch. “Oh bite me, Bond.”

“That could be arranged.”

Q snorts into his glass. “Somehow I don’t think I’m your type.”

“I have a type?”

“Usually married. Usually women.”

“Usually would be the operative word there. I’m not entirely heterosexual, Q.”

“Close enough.”

“Close only counts in horseshoes and hand grenades, and you haven’t given me dispensation for the latter in months.”

“That’s because you behave like a child on Christmas whose father gave him an M-16.”

“It wasn’t an M-16. It was an Anderson Wheeler 500 NE Double Rifle.”

Q stares at him when he says this because James’ voice has gone soft, and he’s staring into the bottom of his glass like it’s where he wants to live. Q sets his own drink aside and gently lays a hand on James’ arm. James looks at him, ice blue eyes meeting shimmering green, and for a long moment, nothing happens.

So Q reaches over and gently takes James’ glass and sets it next to his own before moving closer on the sofa. He cups James’ face in his hands and looks at him, searching his eyes. The pain is so clear now, and Q knows without a doubt that something happened in Istanbul, something that very nearly broke the man before him. James came to him, needs him. Q is going to prove himself worthy of that trust. “Why are you here James? Why me?”

James doesn’t speak, but he takes a deep breath that shudders in his chest… are those tears welling up against his lashes? Q watches closely but they don’t fall. Not yet. And then James leans towards him, and Q almost leans away. They can’t do this. He’s James’ superior for Christ’s sake and surely they’ll regret it, but he’s so bloody curious. What’s it like to kiss  _ James Bond _ ? And in that second Q suddenly understands. Because James Bond is in his flat, because James Bond has kissed him. Because this is James asking him for help. So he leans into it and kisses James back.

James’ lips are soft, and when his tongue slips into Q’s mouth, he tastes like scotch. He seems eager to deepen the kiss, and Q nearly loses himself to the wanting of it all. James is sliding his hand down to cup Q through his sleep pants as he starts to push Q back against the sofa. “James, wait.” Q gently but firmly presses his hand to James’ chest. “Let me, yeah?”

Q begins to push, laying James back against the sofa and hovering over him to kiss those wonderful lips again. James is a bloody good kisser, and Q allows himself a small moment to treasure that knowledge. With James beneath him now, Q begins working on his clothes and taking his time. James isn’t lying still; he does shift about and help take the pressure off his jacket and shirt, though Q spends time kissing the exposed, tanned skin of James’ chest before dropping the shirt to the floor.

Shoes and socks are next, followed by trousers, and Q adds his dressing gown and shirt to the growing pile of clothes. His modesty is only protected by his sleep pants now, and what little modesty James still possesses (if any) is covered by his pants. Q can see the outline of James’ cock through the material, and he leans down to mouth at the shaft.

“ _ Q _ ,” James moans softly. He reaches down to stroke his fingers through Q’s hair, a gesture so gentle that Q marvels at it. He pulls James’ pants down and beholds the man naked beneath him.

“You’re gorgeous,” he murmurs. Q runs his hands over James’ skin, massaging his arms as he kisses a trail down to James’ cock. He glances up, waiting to make sure James was alright with this. The hand in his hair tugs a little and James nods once. Q begins to kiss and lick at the hard length. He teases it harder and watches it twitch and leak under his ministrations. It’s not particularly huge, but it’s lovely, a good, solid size that Q knows would feel wonderful inside him. He even takes his time to admire James’ naked body more closely. James is very well groomed with a trimmed patch of wiry blond hair around his cock. Q realizes as he spreads James’ legs and really gets a look at him that the rest of his body is hairless. He must wax. Ohhhhhhhh, Q grins. “Roll over.”

James’ eyes widen slightly, and Q leans up to kiss him again. “Trust me. Roll over.” He nods and does so while Q runs to retrieve lube and condoms from the cupboard. He sets everything on the coffee table and drops his pants before kneeling between James’ legs again. This time Q kisses down James’ back and digs his fingers into some of the tenser muscles in his shoulders. “That’s it. Relax,” he croons, kissing down until his mouth hovers over James’ arse. God, even his arse is toned. Q spreads James’ cheeks apart and licks down to his hole (which is also hairless). “Let me do this for you,” is all he says before he flicks his tongue against James’ hole.

Q feels James tense at first, but with a little work from Q’s tongue, James starts groaning softly as he relaxes once more. If this only happens once, at least Q can say he did this with and for James. He needs to help James out of his head a little, and from his personal experience, a tongue in the arse is a very good way to start.

Once he feels James squirming onto his tongue, Q lubes up one finger and starts working it in slowly. He’s learning James’ body now, his curiosity and natural observation that put him ahead of the rest of his field enabling him to read what James needs. The second finger slips in with no problem, and he scissors his fingers to aid in the stretch. He’s a tad thicker than James and a bit longer too, though from what he’s seen, James is a grower for certain.

With his third finger joining the others, Q rubs James’ lower back while he searches for James’ prostate. He finds it and gently strokes the bundle of nerves which sends James into little spasms of pleasure. “Q,” he moans again, turning to look behind him at the Quartermaster. “Q.”

Q nods and withdraws, nudging James back onto his back as he puts on a condom. James needs this, he reminds himself as he slicks up his cock and lines up with James’ arse. He locks eyes with James as he starts to press inside. Bloody hell, even with his prep James is still tight around him. The muscles grip his cock and pull him deeper until Q slips in the last inch. James’ eyes are a little wider, and Q can see how aroused he is. Those normally ice chip eyes are nearly black, and he imagines his look rather similar. Leaning down, Q kisses James and begins to rock slowly. James wraps his arms and legs around Q and pulls him close, rocking up to meet the languid thrusts.

In those first minutes, they take their time. Q can’t remember ever feeling this way with other lovers. He feels connected to James on a whole new level. He can feel James’ heartbeat as if it were his own, can sense how he needs to adjust his angle or kiss this patch of skin. James is learning too, especially when it comes to Q’s hair. Q’s always known his head is sensitive, and each tug sends a thrill through him that maybe makes him thrust a little harder.

When James reaches between them to stroke himself, Q starts speeding up. He can feel his orgasm building, and James is panting now. “Together, come on,” Q urges as he angles himself to hit James’ prostate just right. Several seconds of steady thrusting suddenly send James into his orgasm. He arches and groans, milking his own cock as Q’s hips stutter and he comes into the condom, unable to hold back once James really clenches tight around him. They collapse together on the sofa, breathing hard and going soft. Q ties off the condom and chucks it in the bin before picking up his shirt and wiping up James’ cum from his chest. Then he lays down with his head right over James’ heart and holds him as the sweat dries on their bodies.

It’s only like this that he looks up to see tears leaking out of James’ eyes as James looks away from him. Q slides up a little on the sofa and pulls a blanket down over them. He doesn’t speak, doesn’t try to fix it, but he does his best to comfort James: he holds him.

Q loses track of time with his arms wrapped around James while the man cries, but at some point he falls asleep, waking the next morning to an empty flat. He sits up and runs a hand through his tousled sleep-and-sex hair while trying to stave off the inevitable sorrow that it was just a one night stand, when he sees a note taped to the liquor bottle on the table.

_ Buy some better scotch. -J _


	25. Travel Trouble

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There's nothing worse than realizing you forgot to pack something.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags:
> 
> -dialogue only  
> -silly boys

**Prompt: “You can use mine, if you want.”**

 

“Wait, where is it?”

“Where’s what?”

“Bollocks, I can’t believe I’ve done this.”

“Done  _ what _ Simon?”

“I… I forgot my toiletries. All of them. The case isn’t in my bag… bloody hell it was when Hawking was coughing up a hairball. I went to clean it and came back and just zipped up the suitcase.”

“You can use mine, if you want.”

“No, I’ll go down to the lobby shop and… buy replacements.”

“Simon. Be sensible. You like what you use, and I know you like what I use. I don’t mind sharing.”

“You just want me to smell like you.”

“That’s just an added bonus.”

“And you want to get me into the shower.”

“Again, bonuses. Having you naked is a definite perk.”

“I suppose. I just want to wash the travel off.”

“Allow me to assist you.”


	26. Battered Bruises

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some people can't walk across flat surfaces without tripping.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags:
> 
> -fluff? I think?  
> -It's cute.  
> -James caring for Q  
> -pre-slash

**Prompt: “What happened?”**

 

James saunters into Q-branch as he always does midmorning now and makes his way to Q’s office. Without knocking, he opens the door, but James stops when he sees Q.

Q’s standing in his pants and looking in the mirror against the far wall. His body is covered in slowly developing bruises of various shades of red and purple. Something fierce and protective swells in James’ chest, and he quickly shuts the door behind him. “Who did this to you?”

Q starts and whirls around, eyes widening as he sees James. “N-Nothing,” he stammers.

“Bullshit. Who did this to you?

“No one. No one did this to me. I…” Q stares at his feet, and James swears he can see Q blush. It’s a rather fetching look on him, but now is no time to be distracted.

“Then what happened?”

“You’ll laugh.”

“No, I won’t,” James replies, schooling his expression expertly into polite concern.

“It started with this one.” Q sighs and shows James a nasty bruise on his thigh. “I ran into a table in my flat this morning trying to feed the cats and things just got worse from there. I stubbed my toe, broke a glass, and missed the bus.” He shakes his head and pinches the bridge of his nose. “There’s a reason I don’t take the Tube. I can’t even ride the escalator down without falling.”

“You fell?”

“Down almost the entire way to the platform, yes. And then promptly ran into my door coming into the office.” Q winces as he tries to move, and James realizes he probably pulled and strained several muscles that aren’t showing outward signs of injury.

That protective feeling is still buzzing in James’ body, so he leads Q over to the sofa and sits him down. “First aid kit?” Q points, and James fetches the box, pleased to find a tube of arnica cream amongst the plasters. He opens the tube and squeezes a little cream onto his fingers. “May I?”

Q raises an eyebrow skeptically, but he does nod his assent. James begin working the cream as gently as he can into the bruises. “I swear by the stuff,” he murmurs as he works, starting with Q’s arms and torso before moving to his legs. “It keeps the swelling down and helps the bruises heal.” It takes both hands massaging the stuff into Q’s skin to cover all the bruises on his legs. “And you’ll want to do it a few times a day just to be sure. I can’t do much for the pain. My solution is typically scotch, but I have a feeling you’d frown if I suggested drinking at work.”

James sees Q’s lip twitch, and that sardonic air comes back to the Quartermaster. “I would indeed as it is irresponsible and could lead to more broken equipment. Speaking of which-”

“Is it time for my daily dressing down?”

“Since I’ve had mine, I would say so.”

It’s James’ turn to smirk, admiring Q’s mostly naked body. “As loath as I am to suggest actually putting on clothes, I’m sure your minions will be swarming you in no time.”

“I really should get dressed again… thank you. James.”

James glances back at Q, and something else is pulling at his chest now. There’s a tenderness in Q’s voice at saying his name that makes James want to hear it again. And there’s another part of him that hopes he will.


	27. Deadly Double

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> MI6 has been infiltrated again, and no one saw this coming.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags:
> 
> -angst  
> -This will hurt  
> -double agents

**Prompt: “You need to leave.” + Angst Prompt Table- Secrets**

 

James still isn’t sure what he’s seeing because what’s before him is impossible. It can’t be true. Not again. But the longer he stares, the more he realizes that once again, he has been duped.

Q’s back is to him as Q watches several screens. He’s abandoned his jumper for a dark, perfectly tailored suit, and when he turns around, James feels a dull ache in his chest as he realizes the shirt matches Q’s eyes. Fuck, he needs to stop caring  _ now _ .

“You need to leave.”

Q’s tone is clipped and cold. There’s no hidden laughter or amusement there. There’s nothing soft left in his appearance. Even his hair, that wild mane James loves to bury his fingers in is combed and slicked down. Q’s glasses are gone too; his face looks alien without them.

“Why should I?” James’ hands are on his gun, he’s leveled it at Q. Why hasn’t he fired? Why is he waiting? But it’s  _ Q _ there in front of him.

“I’m giving you a chance, Bond. It’s the only one you’ll get from me. For… old time’s sake.”

“You’re a traitor. You know I’ll be sent to hunt you down.”

Q smiles almost sadly, and there it is, a trace of the man he-and then it’s gone. “Most likely. But you won’t be able to find me. I got what I came for.”

Pain arcs through James as several thousand volts shoot through the panels he’s standing on, effectively tasering him and dropping him to the ground. Q walks over to him and kicks the gun away before crouching close. There’s a smile on his face now, but it’s completely devoid of any warmth. It’s the smile of a madman.

“It was too easy, really. You were supposed to be this great challenge, the one man no one could break. But I succeeded where my twin failed. She was too stupid to give you up so she killed herself and saved you.  _ You _ caused her death. So I waited. We sent Silva on the warpath, and with M out of the way, you needed comfort. And I was there.”

James tries to glare at the man in front of him, but his chest is aching with pain and realization and horror. He can see the resemblance now, especially with Q’s hair slicked down. How could he have been so  _ blind _ ?

“The effects should wear off in an hour or so. Surveillance won’t show me. Oh,” he pauses as if considering something. “Franz says hello.”

And then he’s gone, sweeping out of Q branch without another word and leaving James behind. 


	28. Curse Cancer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Being a double-oh tends to limit one's life expectancy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags:
> 
> -angst  
> -implied suicidal ideation  
> -dialogue only
> 
> I FINISHED THE ANGST TABLE WITH THIS ONE! WOO!

**Prompt: “I wish we could stay like this forever.” + Angst Prompt Table- Free Space**

 

“It’s my choice.”

“That doesn’t mean I like it and you know it. I  _ don’t _ want to do this, James.”

“Q, I’m asking. It’s a death sentence anyway.”

“That does not-”

“It is. They just didn’t catch it before.”

“Because you’re a stubborn git who doesn’t ever go to Medical.”

“What else do you need to say?”

“That I want to hate you for this but I can’t. That I hate this disease. That I-fuck, James, I don’t want to lose you. Not when I fight so hard to bring you home every time.”

“Come here.”

“What am I going to do when you’re gone?”

“You’ll figure it out. You always do.”

“I just got everything together. I found you.”

“I know.”

“You know how I feel.”

“Yes, I do.”

“How long did they say?”

“A month at best.”

“... _ fuck _ .”

“I know.”

“I wish we could stay like this forever. Just… holding each other.”

“I know.”

“Do you know everything?”

“I know how you feel. Right now, that’s enough.”


	29. Idyllic Innocence

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We can learn so much from the innocence and imagination of children.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags:
> 
> -child!James and child!Q  
> -childhood friends  
> -fluff

**Prompt: “I have to protect you.”**

 

There’s a certain innocence to be found in children’s play. Parents will sometimes sneak to the door to listen to the stories and smile at the joy they hear. Sometimes the stories weave the most marvelous fantasies for children’s minds are magical places.

It’s a rainy Scottish afternoon that traps the boys inside, and tired of watching it rain, James turns to his best friend. “Let’s play knights and dragons.”

Quentin’s eyes widen at the thought. “Can I be the dragon?”

“Sure! I’ll be the knight. Come on!”

James leads the way through Skyfall to their playroom, a large chamber off the Great Hall that houses their toys, and sure enough, the cedar chest in the corner has what they need. James fastens the plastic mail to his chest and places the helmet upon his head. Quentin takes out the green iridescent dragon with wings that velcro around his arms. He even has a dragon head hood that covers his dark, wild hair.

“What kind of dragon do you want to be?”

“I like adventures. Can I be a dragon who travels with a brave knight?”

James puffs his chest out a little at the word ‘brave’ and nods. “And I’m a knight who is looking for…” He frowns for a moment, thinking, “for the most powerful sword in the land.”

“What happens if you find it?”

“No one knows.” James’ eyes shine with excitement as Quentin watches, enraptured. He loves when James tells stories; two years in their ages makes all the difference in James’ power over story magic. “The legends say only the bravest knight can use it. And that it could do great good or great evil.”

“Which will you use it for?”

“Why, for good of course.”

Quentin grins and stretches out his arms, roaring as best he can. “Who dares come to the lair of-of Q the Great and Powerful?”

James stands, brandishing a small plastic sword. “Sir James of Skyfall is here!”

“What do you want?”

“I’m looking for the Sword of Destiny.”

Quentin’s lip twitches and he has to struggle not to laugh. James looks so serious except for the smile in his eyes. “Why?”

“Because it’s powerful. And I want to help people.”

“The sword is dangerous. You could get hurt.”

“I won’t get hurt. I promise.”

Quentin pretends to consider this. “I know where it is. I can take you.” He grabs James’ hand and they go running off through the mansion. The way is dangerous and filled with goblins and ogres, with mean knights that Quentin and James bring down with clever tricks (though they’re always careful to never kill). Finally they reach the resting place of the Sword of Destiny.

“Why do you really want it?” Quentin asks as he peeks around the doorframe.

“I have to protect you,” is James’ answer.

They look at each other for a moment, boys of nine and seven, and share a moment well beyond their years. Their future will contain so much danger and many evil knights to slay, but right now they are just two boys and they are playing. “The sword is in there. Let’s get it and save the world.”

James grins and takes Quentin’s hand. “As long as I can save you too.”


	30. Ill-tempered Invalid

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> James is a horrible patient.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags:
> 
> -dialogue only  
> -fluff  
> -domestic

**Prompt: “Stop hogging all the blankets.”**

 

“No, I’m afraid your temperature has gone back up again, James.”

“You’re no bloody fun.”

“Now, stop that moping. You just need some more ibuprofen and more liquids.”

“You’re going to drown me with water. I’m not a plant, Q.”

“No, but you have a fever.”

“Oh come on.”

“I’m not having that.”

“Stop hogging all the blankets.”

“If you hide under that many layers, James, you’ll get sicker.”

“Spoilsport.”

“This could be so much worse. You could be vomiting you know.”

“Feels like I’m dying. Can’t you give a dying man blankets?”

“The blankets might just kill you.”

“If this doesn’t.”

“Now who is the drama queen?”

“You’re not sick.”

“No, I’m not. I’m worried about you. Now take your medicine, come on. And swallow… good.”

“‘M tired.”

“You must be feeling sick. You just left that hanging?”

“Don’t leave?”

“I’m right here. I’ve got you.”


	31. Burned Body

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Q is far too pale for time at the beach.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags:
> 
> -minor hurt/comfort  
> -NSFW  
> -fingering  
> -oral sex  
> -banter  
> -fluff

**Prompt: “Don’t touch me.”**

 

“Don’t touch me.”

“I’ll be right back.” There’s footsteps and the soft sound of a door closing, and Q is alone. Q whimpers as he lies on his stomach on the soft cotton sheets; even that stimulation hurts. His whole body is in horrible pain, and where the bloody hell is James? Hadn’t he said he’d be right there? Tears sting his eyes as he tries to find some way to be comfortable, but even moving a fraction of an inch pulls his abused skin too much.

“Q?” Oh thank god it’s James. Q hears the door slam and footsteps approach.

“In here. Where the hell have you been?”

James moves into view, and Q can see a practically industrial sized bottle of aloe lotion in his hands. “We didn’t pack any.”

Q nods and instantly regrets it as his neck flares in pain.

“Shhhhh hold still. This is going to feel cold.”

“Anything. It burns. It burns so terribly.”

“What the hell were you thinking? Didn’t you put on sun block?”

“When we left this morning, yes.”

“Did you reapply at all?”

There’s silence as Q thinks back over the morning, realizing he’d been more than a little distracted with James in swimming trunks to put on more sun block. “...no…”

“No wonder. You’re the color of a freshly cooked lobster.” Q hears James pop the cap on the bottle and squeeze some out. Then the first wave of biting cold lotion touches his skin, and he whimpers.

“Ow ow ow… ohhhhhhh oh that’s helping already.”

The initial shock hurts more until the pain melts into cool, soothing relief. His back had gotten the worst of the sunburn, but there’s some on his front, particularly on his arms. He hadn’t been facing the sun when his block had worn off. 

James is very gentle as he works, and Q is so grateful. The pain slowly fades away to be replaced with more of a dull ache for now.

“Take these.”

James hands him several ibuprofen, and Q manages to swallow them with the help of a glass of water. “I’m sorry I’ve ruined our trip.”

“Ruined? Nonsense.” James kneels in front of Q to brush the hair from his face and look his husband in the eye. “I need to keep a more careful eye on you.”

“I should be able to take better care of myself. I’m more sensible than this.”

“Well, yes. But we can always take another honeymoon.”

Q sighs and shakes his head, wincing. “That’s not the point. Look in my suitcase.”

James raises an eyebrow but does what he’s told. He unzips and opens Q’s suitcase to find deep green lingerie and matching heels resting at the top. Q can see how his eyes widen and darken, and he knows James is picturing him wearing the clothes. “I was going to strip for you tonight, do a sexy dance for you, hopefully have some steamy wall sex that knocks the pictures down. And now I can’t.” God, his eyes are burning, and it’s hard to breathe. No, no he will not cry right now.

He feels the hand under his chin more than sees it, and then James kisses him gently, nipping his lip. “Come on. I have an idea.”

James helps Q up and into the bathroom. The shower in their suite is huge with easily enough room for four people. “What are we doing?”

James doesn’t answer for a moment as he turns on the water and gets it to the right temperature. “This should be nice and cool.”

Still hesitant but curious, Q climbs in and stands beneath the spray. It stings a little at first, but James is right. It’s cool and refreshing and soon Q can feel some of the tension seeping from his body. Until he sees James strip. And kneel down in the shower. Right in front of him.

“Uh… James… what are you-”

“Let me do this for you.”

There’s something so open in James’ expression that Q’s heart constricts. He just nods instead and watches, wide eyed, as James begins to kiss his soft cock. He mouths it expertly, alternately kissing and licking and all the while staring up at Q.

Q swallows hard as he feels himself begin to harden. It never takes much with James to turn him on, never has; a single look or a quirked eyebrow can leave Q with half a hard-on in seconds, but this seems more intimate somehow. He knows James has an oral thing, loves giving when it comes to sex, and maybe it’s that they’re married now, but it feels different. It’s more intense, more focused. It’s about the two of them and no one else.

Q reaches down to run his fingers through James’ hair as his husband takes him further into his mouth to begin sucking. The suction makes Q’s knees buckle for a moment, and he grabs the shower bar to stay standing. Bloody hell, he’s definitely hard now. He’s holding James’ head and James is reaching around to grasp Q’s arse with greedy hands. Never in his life has Q been so grateful for swimming trunks; his arse is unburned, and James massages the pert muscles as he hollows his cheeks and sucks harder.

“ _ Fuck _ ,” Q groans, and he rocks into James’ mouth. James is really his. They have the rings to prove it. James’ retirement papers went in a week ago. They’re married and James is retired from spy work, and they’re on their bloody honeymoon. God he loves this man.

They lock eyes again, and James swallows him further, working Q over in earnest now. Q’s so distracted by watching James that he fails to notice the fingers sneaking towards his arsehole until one blunt finger begins working in, aided by the water from the shower.

“Oh shit! Fuck, fuck don’t stop,” he pleads, gripping the shower bar as he pushes back against the finger. How in the world did he get this lucky? Q rocks forward and he slides into James’ mouth, backward and he impales himself on clever, lethal fingers. He desperately wants James to fuck him, but until his burn heals up a bit more, it’ll have to be this… though Q could definitely get used to this.

There’s two fingers inside him now, and as James pulls back to suckle just the head of Q’s cock, he finds Q’s prostate and goes to town. He is merciless, pressing and rubbing until Q is almost sobbing with need. Every touch sends waves of pleasure through him, and he wants to come. He needs to come. He’s begging James to let him. “ _ Please, fuck, please _ !”

James smirks as he swallows Q all the way to the hilt and sucks as hard as he can while fingering his husband, and Q comes. Q cries out James’ name and clings to James’ shoulder and the shower bar to keep from falling as his knees buckle with the force of it. Endorphins flood his brain until the pain from his burn is barely a dull ache, and blissfully relaxed, he slides to the floor and curls up against James’ chest. He feels safest here with his head resting over James’ heart.

“That was… I mean… just…  _ fuck _ ,” he giggles, giddy and happy and sated. “Was it as good for you?”

“I could watch you come undone forever,” James murmurs, his voice that post-blow job raspy Q secretly loves.

“I only come undone for you.”

“Sap.”

“Your sap.”

“I suppose you are, aren’t you.”

“Mmmmmm, you were there.”

“And now I’m here.”

“Just promise me you won’t touch my burns with a towel.”

“How about I blow you dry?”

Q grins and kisses James happily. “Absolutely.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I DID IT! I BLOODY DID IT! AND ON TIME!
> 
> Thank you so much for reading. Thank you 007 fest for the impetus and inspiration. <3
> 
> I love this fandom.

**Author's Note:**

> Reviews and comments are welcome.


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